This refugee is Des Moines' first southeast Asian police sergeant

Doua Lor as told to Linh Ta

Editor's Note: Doua Lor first told this story on stage at the Des Moines Storytellers Project: "Everyday Miracles" event. The next event is "Busted" on April 5. An edited version of his story appears below. 

Doua Lor, a sergeant at the Des Moines Police Department, shares his story about achieving his dream career as a police officer at the Des Moines Storyteller's project at the Des Moines Playhouse on Tuesday, Feb. 6, 2018.

I am a Highlander-Lao that lived in the mountain region. My father got recruited as a soldier during the Vietnam War to help the American CIA protect the Ho Chi Minh trail and rescue all the American pilots when their planes were shot down.  

In May 1975, when the communists took over my country, it forced my father to make the biggest decision of his life: Either escape to Thailand to live another day or stay and face execution by the communists.

My father decided to take my family to Thailand to live for another day.  At this time, I was very young. We arrived in a military camp first, then we moved to a refugee camp called Ban Vinai in 1976.  In 1978, my father decided to take my family to the United States and we arrived in Fort Worth, Texas.  

We moved from a Third World country to the First World country and I will tell you, it was pretty stressful and depressing. It was a shock for my family.  At this time, I was about eight and half years old and the only English words I knew were “yes" and "no.”

As I got older, my English got better.  

My mother taught me how to cook when I was a very young age, since she did not have any daughters.  When it came to cooking, she had no worries at all because she knew I will be there for her.  

I learned how to write my dad’s checkbook when I was nine.  

I helped interpret for the Hmong and Lao community when I was 12.  I can speak five different languages: Hmong, Lao, Tai Dam, Thai and English.  

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On career day, during my middle school years, a guy came to my school and asked me, "What you want to do when you grow up, son?"  I told him that I wanted to become a police officer or a prosecutor in the criminal justice system.  I wanted to help the Asian community and make a difference in the community that I live in.

After high school, I went to work for four years to help my parents and save money for college.  Then, I decided to go to Iowa State University for electrical engineering because I wanted to make a lot of money after college.  

While attending Iowa State, I was struggling with school, work and family.  Then I found out that my mother was dying of lung cancer caused by secondhand smoke.  My heart was broken and I cried many times.

Before my mother passed away, she told me, “Son, money is not everything in life. It’s how you live your life.”  

My mother also advised me to pursue my original dream to become a police officer. She told me I was a kind person with a good heart that will work well with people.  

"You will do well in public service." Then she passed away.

After my mother passed away, I came back to Iowa and started to look for a career in law enforcement.  In 1995, the Des Moines Police Department took me in as police cadet.

When I served as a police cadet, I had numerous supervisors encourage me to become a police officer due to my bilingual skills and work ethic.  In 1997, I got promoted to a police officer.  I went to the police academy and I was the only Asian minority and the second-shortest person in the class.  

It was very difficult for me at first. I went through some training that I never encountered in my life: Driving, shooting, ground-fighting and so on. Between studying and getting injured, I was determined to complete the training, no matter what happened. 

I wanted to do it for my mother and the Asian community.  I wanted to send a message to the Asian community that in this country they can trust and count on the police.

When I graduated from the police academy, it was one of the happiest moments in my life and opened another chapter for me.

After six years working as a patrol officer, in 2003, a group of Asian leaders came to Chief McCarthy and asked him to create an outreach program for the Asian community after the Latino Outreach Program was formed. They told Chief McCarthy that they want someone who looked like them to to represent them. At this time, Chief McCarthy  asked me to take the lead on the project. 

I told him it would be a great honor to take the lead on this project.

In the Asian Outreach Program, I help educate the Asian community about law enforcement functions and resources available to them.    

I remember one day I was called to the police station to translate for two elderly Asian couples regarding a homicide their son was involved in.  When I got to the police station, I saw these two couples sitting on a bench looking very scared and nervous. I introduced myself to them and told them I am here to help.  I help them through numerous hours of interviews with the detectives.  After the interviews were done, they told me that they don’t have any money for their son’s funeral and don’t know what to do. I advised them that don’t worry, since their son was a victim of a crime there’s a program that can help them and I will help them with the process.  At this point, I can see the smiling and happiness on their faces.

Then they both said, “Thank you, son.” At this moment, I realized that I have made a huge impact in these two peoples' life.

Looking back with the Asian Outreach Program, I am very proud and honored to serve the Asian community and that I was able to make a difference in many Asians' lives. 

The most important thing is just to be there for them and make them feel comfortable and show that the police department does have someone that looks like them.  

When I became a police officer I had two goals: First, to establish the Asian Outreach Program and second, get promoted through rank. I knew that it was not going to easy task. However, by working hard with determination and never give up, I was able to get it done.

It took me 20 years to get promoted to a sergeant. However, it was worth the wait.

When I was on the promotion list, my father was in the hospital with a collapsed lung and had two major surgeries. At this time he told me, "Son, don't worry. I'll make it to your promotion."

I got promoted on May 4 and he passed away on June 4 — a month apart. He was not able to come to ceremony because of doctor restrictions, however, he was able to view the whole video live from his hospital bed.

I'm thankful my dad was able to see what I accomplished in my life before he passed away. I want to thank my mother for her greatest advice: "Money is not everything in life. It’s how you live your life that matters the most.” 

About the storyteller: Doua Lor was born in Laos and attended Iowa State University before joining the Des Moines Police Department where he built the Asian Outreach Program. Lor says he is married a wonderful woman and has four beautiful kids. He was promoted to the rank of sergeant in 2017.

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Storytellers show

THE NEXT EVENT: "Busted: Stories of how I got caught" will feature two shows April 5 at the Temple Theater. The early show at 5:30 p.m. is sold out, but limited tickets are available for the 8:30 p.m. show. Register journalist Courtney Crowder is hosting. Storytellers will be coached by Register journalists.

HOW TO ATTEND: General admission tickets are $10 and VIP tickets, which include a free drink, are $25. Buy them at DesMoinesRegister.com/Storytellers.

The 2018 storytelling season

THIS YEAR: Tickets for the entire season are on sale at DesMoinesRegister.com/Storytellers. Subscribers can earn a discount on tickets by using their Insider credentials to unlock a special promo code at checkout. Anyone needing assistance can contact events@dmreg.com or call 515-619-6548.

  • Busted: Stories of when I got caught. April 5 at the Temple Theater, Des Moines. Shows at 5:30 p.m (sold out). and 8:30 p.m.
  • Blended: Cultures mixing, changing and thriving in Iowa. June 7 at Curate, Des Moines. Shows at 5:30 p.m. and 8:30 p.m.
  • Rural Life: Celebrating our roots and small-town squads. July 12 at the River Center, Des Moines. Shows at 5:30 p.m. and 8:30 p.m.
  • Siblings: Love, rivalry and lasting ties. Sept. 20 at Forte, Des Moines. Shows at 5:30 p.m. and 8:30 p.m.
  • War Stories: Battles on the frontline and back home. Dec. 6 at the Tea Room, Des Moines. Shows at 5:30 p.m. and 8:30 p.m.

TELLING A STORY: We believe that everyone has a story worth telling, and everyone can tell a story. Register journalists coach storytellers for each of our events. Read our guidelines and submit a story by clicking "Speak" at DesMoinesRegister.com/Storytellers. Please note that the stage is not guaranteed.

STORYTELLERS STORE: Embrace local storytelling with our new notebooks, mugs and apparel, available online in different colors. Order at ShopDMRegister.com/Storytellers.

Catch the stories

Missed the event? You can still enjoy stories from "Everyday Miracles: Blind luck, spiritual moments and awakenings."  

TELEVISION: Medicom rebroadcasts stories from the most recent show on MC22 periodically; check local listings for times

PODCAST: Listen to the Des Moines Storytelllers podcast, which is available on iTunes and Stitcher

ONLINE: Videos from this and other Storytellers events can be found at DesMoinesRegister.com/Storytellers under "Watch & Listen."

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